My Wordfish Got Fat

These are the words for the wordfish. He breathes them and poops in them and then breathes them again. He lives right here in this blog, feeding on occasional “likes” and “follows” and “comments.” His name is Dave (per one of you). But here’s the problem: you guys have been feeding him too much. Last time we saw him he was just a wee little thing. He was hungry and wordfishscared. But now the guy’s bloated, confident, and taking up space. Look how big he is! He’s totally messing with the aesthetic here. What a sloppy-looking post. I’m embarrassed. He can barely fit in the words! Too many readers left “likes” last time, and now this is what we have to deal with. If you guys keep feeding him (or subscribing to this blog) who knows how big he’ll get. Geez, this never happened to the first wordfish, Patrick 2. Nobody really fed him and he just eventually died of starvation. I was kinda secretly hoping that would happen to Dave too, because I really didn’t want to have to keep worrying about him and changing his water all the time. I’m a young man. I kinda just wanted to live my life. But now I got a beluga whale on my hands. Thanks, readers.

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5 Responses to My Wordfish Got Fat

  1. M. R. says:

    …in which case you’re going to have to change your illustration, yeah? [grin]

    • Fred Fingery says:

      haha, good point. Sadly, time restraints nudged me in the direction of going “increased-bitmap-scale” as opposed to “photoshopped bitmap food baby.” A boy can dream, though,

      • M. R. says:

        Warning, Will Robinson! – the word ‘PhotoShop’ tends to make my face go dark red and the veins stand out in my neck … But come to think of it, that’s when it arises in the context of shots of water.

      • Fred Fingery says:

        Actually, I’m a little embarrassed I just used Photoshop as a verb. People do that way too much, even when they’re not even talking about the official “Photoshop” program. They think it just means “doctored the photo by means of a generic photo-doctoring application.”

      • M. R. says:

        Hokaaay. Guilty of that meself, on occasion – but using Corel PhotoPaint. My husband used to remove festoons of electrical cables from photos taken in Italy, and defended his right to do so. I can say without a doubt his pictures were lovelier than anyone else’s! 😀

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