Unorthodox Sex Advice: Caller # 4

relationship-troubleAnd now, after a long hiatus, it’s time to dish out more unorthodox sex advice. Today’s caller comes to us from Los Angeles, California.  

Jerry: Hey Prac! I’m gonna get right to the point. Why does the girl laugh at me when we’re done with sex?

practicallyserious.com: Ooh. I don’t know. This could be the symptom of so many different things. Really, so many. I don’t even know where to begin. I’d need more information. For example, let’s start with the fact that your name is ‘Jerry.’ That’s all I know about you so far. No last name. I mean, for all I know, you’re freakin’ Jerry Seinfeld. And if that’s the case, maybe you practice your new stand-up material right there in bed, right after sex. If so, that’s not good. She’ll laugh.

Jerry: Haha. I am Jerry Seinfeld (probably should have checked that first, huh), and good advice on the not-practicing-my-act-in-bed thing. Because I do. I’ll try and stop and then I’ll call you tomorrow.

practicallyserious.com: Cool. Talk to you then.

Jerry (next day): Okay. So I stopped rehearsing my act in bed but she still laughs at me. Why?

practicallyserious.com: Geez. I don’t know. This kinda changes the whole situation. I mean, so you stopped rehearsing your act?

Jerry: Yes.

practicallyserious.com: And she still laughs? After sex?

Jerry: Yes.

practicallyserious.com: Yikes. Okay. New strategy. Let’s rewind. Problem could be the actual sex itself. I guess just try and last a little longer sex-wise. I mean, for starters, see if you can last longer than 52 seconds total.

Jerry: Okay. Good advice. Awesome advice! Thanks. Oh, but just one more question though.

practicallyserious.com: Yeah?

Jerry: How?

Practicallyserious.com: (hangs up)

__________________

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This entry was posted in Practically Humorous, Relationships, Unorthodoxy and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Unorthodox Sex Advice: Caller # 4

  1. cestlavie22 says:

    Haha! Why is it that I would not be surprised that he couldnt last longer than a minute? He is probably one of the “pre” cursed ones! Poor sap.

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