Flash Fiction: “Outside Bets”

Outside Bets

As the five children standing around the homemade roulette table placed sweet treats down on the construction paper betting layout, Sam smiled to himself because he figured he’d be getting most of that candy. One of his friends had bet on evens, the rest took way long shots.

A crow awwked and Sam looked up. He binoculared his hands to keep the sun from his eyes. That bird again, he thought. Thing follows my wheel around the neighborhood.

Now he spun the wobbly hubcap and dropped the red gumball and it skipped and clicked while Sam’s buddies watched with greedy hands. Sam snuck a look at them and thought the house always wins.

The wheel slowed and the gumball tired. Sam licked his lips. But just as the gumball took its last hop, the crow swooped down in a wild flutter and snatched it up just like it did last weekend.

Thanks again to Susie for inspiring me to try my hand at this stuff (150-word flash fiction). It’s pretty hard, actually, but fun.

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4 Responses to Flash Fiction: “Outside Bets”

  1. alex.r. says:


    Awesome cute story! With such a short story, you sure did add a ton of description. I could see the scene clearly because of the particular adjectives that you used. I didn’t expect the ending and it gave me closure. Now, that’s how you write flash fiction.


    • Bill Carson says:

      Thanks a lot! Yeah, these things are a great writing exercise because there’s no room for a single superfluous word. And the other thing is that the low word count is real easy on the reader.

  2. susielindau says:

    This is great Derek! You gotta love those darn crows. They show up in a lot of my stories too!
    Thanks for the shout out!
    I didn’t participate today, but you are welcome to drop off your link at http://Madisonwoods.com

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